Chapter 795 – Opening Ceremony

“Master, master.” After lunch, Eunch Cao begged me, “Can I borrow your phone for a bit?”

“Don’t you have a phone? Why do you need to borrow mines?”

“Jie jie jie jie.” Eunuch Cao laughed strangely, “I installed a new app and I need two phones to turn on Bluetooth so I could test if it works or not… I won’t look at your personal information, I don’t have the guts.”

That’s true, it’s not like I had anyone to hide in my contacts, and I just cleaned my messages. The only part that was slightly secret was the notes app, but I always set a password…

Wait, while I did set a password, it probably means nothing to the hardware backdoor. It’s probably the equivalent of adding a lock to a cabinet that has holes on it!

Fang Xin and Professor Bai definitely found out about a lot of my secrets through the backdoor on my phone. The will I wrote while I was trapped at the bottom of the bear trap might even be saved on their database.

Damn it, I can’t believe they saw my embarrassing will. The Happy Science Cult is definitely an evil cult and I will destroy their databases.

I haven’t switched modes yet and was still using the Happy Science Cult mode. I thought it would be good to let Eunuch Cao use it to give them some trash data, thus I generously lent my phone to him.

I regretted it two hours later.

Eunuch Cao didn’t look at private information, but it seems he used the text input on my phone.

For a regular person, it doesn’t matter if you let other people type on your phone since the worst thing that could happen is to have your word usage or auto-correct change slightly.

Now that Eunuch Cao used it, there’s a lot of dirty words in the dictionary and you can’t even do anything when it auto-corrects.

After Uncle Fireball, Director Cao, and Eunuch Cao left, I was bored and decided to send a few texts.

I shook the phone vigorously at the rate of “3, 1, 3”. After seeing an inconspicuous white pixel appear on the Contacts icon, I knew I had switched to safe mode.

I sent a message to Ai Mi: “The new term has started. Study hard, keep improving every day. If you have time on the weekend, I’ll bed you…”

Damn, what’s wrong with the auto-correct? The words I wanted to type were, “If you have time on the weekend, I’ll meet you in the mall.” Luckily, I didn’t send it.

After thinking about it, I may not have time to accompany my sister to the mall on the first weekend school starts. This glorious and arduous task might have to be handed over to Winnie.

So I deleted my unsent text message and changed it to: “Keep yourself good mood, if you’re not in a good mood, go beat up B-2 since Dr. Yu can fix it. The last time I came on you in the corridor…”

Eunuch Cao, I’ll kill you, what did you do to my auto-correct? The words I wanted to type were, “The last time I met you in the corridor.”

After two consecutive failures, I stopped sending messages to Ai Mi. It would be too late for regrets if it accidentally causes any misunderstandings.

Instead, I sent a message to Xiao Qin: “I can’t believe you made Winnie give injections for your manga…”

The phrase “be an assistant” was mistyped as “give injections”. Although it’s not a dirty word, it felt like it had another meaning to it.

I couldn’t even send a text to my actual sister or my step-sister, so I might as well send a text to the class leader. I don’t believe Eunuch Cao could have made it that difficult for me to even send a text.

“Class leader, I heard that your mother will come to the parent-teacher meeting tomorrow afternoon, cleavage…”

I wanted to type “if” not “cleavage”! How will the class leader look at me if I sent this text message!

I didn’t give up due to my competitive nature. I decided to delete it and resend a new text message.

“Class leader, are you going to speak as the student representative at the open hole ceremony tomorrow?”

I fell for Eunuch Cao’s trap. I only noticed the typo after I already sent it! How could the opening ceremony be corrected into nonsense? Eunuch Cao, what’s wrong with you, you broke my phone!

I was anxious and didn’t know how the class leader would react after receiving this text message. I wanted to send another one to defend myself, but I typed “I said it wrong” as “I shot it wrong” and quickly deleted it to avoid making another mistake.

The class leader only replied after a while:

“Don’t browse unhealthy sites.”

It couldn’t be helped I was misunderstood by the class leader. She already went easy on me because of my heart problems, otherwise she would have berated me without mercy.

So I called Eunuch Cao and lashed out at him. Eunuch Cao apologized repeatedly and said he forgot to change the user dictionary back after using it.

I took a look and changed it back to my own and the matter was put to rest.

On Monday, September 2nd, the opening ceremony was held in the school auditorium as scheduled, and the host was Xu Yan from class 3-1.

In the past, when the prettiest girl in school acted as the host of various activities, Xu Yan often spoke as the student representative. At the flag-raising ceremony, she was the one who read the speech…

Xu Yan got a little taller after she entered the third year. She might not be as beautiful as the last prettiest girl in school, but she was good-looking enough and became the host of various school events.

Xu Yan was also now the new class leader of class 3-1. She replaced their original nice guy class leader who never wanted to offend anyone. Among the six new third year classes, there were four classes who had female class leaders.

“The first item on the agenda: please rise for the national anthem.”

Xu Yan shouted in a high-pitched voice and her voice echoed throughout the old auditorium. Six red flags were inserted at a slant on the podium, one of which was not properly inserted and was almost shaken out by the vibrations.

As soon as the lights in the auditorium were turned off, it felt like we were at a cinema. Except no one was allowed to eat popcorn. Anyone who dared to snack would lose points.

When Xu Yan announced for everyone to stand up, we, the third years, along with the second and first years all stood up with high spirits and unity… yeah right, would that even be possible?

The reality was that everyone stood like eggplants affected by frost or cucumbers exposed to the sun for ten days. An even more vivid analogy would be zombies infected with the t-Virus.

Only a few people stood energetically, such as the class leader who was always strict with herself, Gong CaiCai, who was afraid of losing points for the class, and Winnie, who for some reason treated this as a competition and stood straight like she was in the military.

Xiao Qin, to my right, also stood very straight.

She wasn’t taking the opening ceremony seriously, but she just didn’t want to seem much shorter than me.

Under the school’s requirement, the vast majority of students wore unfashionable school uniforms to the ceremony. Xiao Qin and I were no exception. In Xiao Qin’s eyes, our uniforms were a “couple’s outfit”, so she tried hard to stand up straight and show that she was a good match for me.

“Don’t get tired.” I said with a smile, “I don’t mind your height.”

“Really?” Xiao Qin seemed to be touched.

The national anthem, which was broadcasted with a worn-out sound system and was slightly out of tune towards the end, finally ended and so did the torture on everyone’s ears.

Someone in class 3-3 complained quietly: “It’s almost as bad as Gong CaiCai’s violin.”

I’m sorry…” Gong CaiCai apologized in the dark to the unidentified speaker, “My violin playing is very bad, I won’t play it again. I can’t believe I had the audacity to think I could learn an instrument…”

“Don’t lose faith.” The class leader consoled her, “As long as you work hard, you will definitely improve in the future.”

“Th-thank you.” Gong CaiCai sniffled, and her shoulders shook from the class leader’s comfort, “You’re so kind, class leader. Would you listen to me play the violin the next time you come to my house?”

“…” The class leader remained silent in the dark.

“Please sit.” After the national anthem, Xu Yan announced hoarsely. It was her first time hosting such a large event, so she was a bit nervous.

We were seated in the auditorium by class. My class, class 3-3, was to the right of class 3-2. My seat was right next to the aisle and across the aisle was Liu Ming from class 3-2. He was the point guard of the school basketball team, and his nickname was “Liu Huai Shui”.

Xiao Qin sat to my right and in front of me was Eunuch Cao, the one who caused a lot of trouble for me yesterday.

“The second item on the agenda: Principal Chen will speak, let’s give him a round of applause.”

Xu Yan adjusted her voice levels and spoke into the microphone word by word from her script.

Principal Chen refers to the old principal of 28 Middle. The principal was the grandfather of Chen YingRan, so of course, his surname was also Chen.

After waiting for a long time, the principal didn’t come on stage. When someone was sent backstage to look for him, they found that he had fallen asleep on a chair.

“Old fart, he should retire at this point.” That’s probably what the vice-principal said based on his lip movements, then he went on stage and adjusted the microphone to his mouth.

“Listen up, whether you are freshmen or third year students, be serious. Don’t treat school like it’s a fun place. School is a battlefield, and your entire life is also a battlefield.”

Next, he began to recite a speech he copied from somewhere. The word choice was extreme and exaggerated. The phrase “this is your last chance in life” was repeated N times.

What the heck, we’re only 14 and we’re about to lose our last chance in life? Vice-principal, how do you expect us to live out our third year? Do you want us to bury ourselves in papers every day, treat all our classmates as competitors, and want to bite everyone with better academic performance than us to death?

However, his repeated mention of the word “change” reminded me that it was time to put my “step-sister training plan” into practice.

The goal of the plan was to transform Xiao Qin into a more positive, more optimistic, more compassionate, and more considerate “ordinary” girl.

As for the methods, I’ve already thought them through. I will adopt the “encouragement teaching” method. If Xiao Qin can go a week without reading shoujo manga, I will pat her head. If Xiao Qin can resist pranks for a week, I will hug her. If Xiao Qin does three good deeds to help others, I will kiss her on the cheek…

Now it’s time to announce the discipline training… no, the training plan to Xiao Qin. It’s also a fresh start for the new school year.

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